The Funk creeps up on you and then settles in. I fight it every year. Actually let me get totally honest and say I fight it a few times a year. I get the holiday funk and a pre-birthday funk in the summer.
Let me start by saying…I am a happy person. I am very positive, encouraging, inspired, determined, and full of joy. But at several points in my life I have struggled with depression. I have taken anti-depressants during some of those years. I went to years of therapy and then I became a therapist. I read the right books. I exercise. I pray. I journal. I surround myself with positive people who love me and encourage me. I have a coach. I attend a support group. And guess what…..the FUNK still happens.
It does not mean that I am not happy. It just means that I am human.
I am good at being alone, and have gotten better at it over the years. I am divorced and I have no children. That was not my grand plan for my life, but this is the life that is mine today.
Yesterday I had a joy filled day with some friends at a Thanksgiving gathering. At one point, I nearly burst into tears and quoted Meg Ryan from the movie When Harry Met Sally and wanted to say, “I spy a family.” I saw in front of me what I long for….. I saw a glimpse of what I thought I would have at 41 years old. But the blessing is that I was able to share my feelings with a few of the people that I was with. I was able to realize that I am right where I am supposed to be today. If not, God would have me in a different place. I know that God knows the desires of my heart. My job is to wait for Him to show me, to lead me, to reveal to me. God knows my desire for a husband. God also knows my longing to be a part of a “family” or create a “family” of my own. This is NOT a surprise to Him at all.
Most days are busy, full, and immersed with me living my God-given passion. But a few times a year the funk comes to find me.
So….if you are feeling the FUNK, please know that you are not alone.
The reality of the holidays is always different than what we might dream up in our fantasy. And I would rather have REAL than FAKE so I need to just be where I am. I choose to LOVE myself in the FUNK and in the MESS. I hope and pray that you will choose this too!
Happy FUNK day! And Happy Holidays~~~
Diane Cunningham is the Founder and President of the National Association of Christian Women Entrepreneurs. She is a “business therapist”, plane crash survivor, author, consultant, speaker, marathon runner, and fun friend. She fights the FUNK and WINS!