Today I am thinking about loss, grief and the “people, places and things” we have to let go of in this lifetime. At this moment, I have a friend in the midst of delivering her precious stillborn baby girl Hannah. I cannot fathom what she is feeling. I am praying for her and her husband and her daughter. I am lifting her up to God, who knows her needs, her pain, her brokenness.
But I do know what it feels like as I have walked through other losses…
I know the loss of divorce. The pain of saying goodbye to a dream, the untangling of a life together.
I have walked through the feelings of never having a child and the ache of unmet motherhood. The guilt over not wanting to attend the baby shower. The avoidance of holding the adorable baby.
I have surrendered an addiction to alcohol and walked through those feelings of loss and powerlessness. The complete willingness to admit that I have no control and needed help.
Grief happens. We tend to run from it. We don’t know how to help other people or talk about it. We don’t want to ask the wrong question and we are afraid of making things worse. The only way to make things worse is to not reach out, in my opinion. Sit next to the person. Send the text. Keep asking.
And when it is US in the midst of it, we tend to hide. When I am hurting, I don’t want you to know about it. I want to hide in my house, or pretend everything is ok. I don’t want you to see my crying on my bathroom floor in the dark of the night, or wandering glassy eyed through Target in the middle of the afternoon. I am afraid to ask you for the help that I desperately need.
I pray that we will all be willing….to ask for help and to be the help.
Let someone love you, hold you, sit next to you. Let yourself be held. Let yourself feel, cry, thrash about. Let it all come out.
God is with you. Let His love wash over you~~