Resistance in Your Business
My mouth is dry as the Sahara desert, and I feel perspiration beads dripping from my armpits, down my side, leaving half-ring, dark stains on my new blouse that everyone can see when I lift my hands or arms even a little (oh, WHY, did I buy a light-colored blouse for this event?!). The mere handful of women who actually showed up are staring curiously at me, waiting for something profound or funny or at least a little interesting to come out of my mouth since they paid to come here.
As I open my lips to speak, the words come tumbling out, not the anointed, inspired word of God that I’d hoped for, but strained, nervous words, as if I am too eager to please these women, words of inadequacy and fear, words without God’s power, or perhaps worst of all, God forbid – words that bore. I use my notes too much and I speak too fast. My two jokes fall flat. They don’t get them. I give a weak smile, and rush on, hoping for an earthquake or something to deliver me from this torture that feels as if it will last forever.
For the next 40 minutes, I am like a car engine starting and stalling, that finally gives one last heavy shake, and dies. I fakely smile to hide the pain that is threatening to cause me to have a complete, hysterical meltdown in front of these strangers. I say goodbyes and thanks, and as the last woman leaves for the night, I begin cleaning the room.
I pack my books that are on the back table (none sold, but one woman looked at one), and then I begin sobbing uncontrollably. I have made $50 for my new local networking meet-and-greet, out of which $45 covered the food and drinks. I have made enough money to buy myself a large Sonic coke or a Starbucks coffee.
I am humiliated. My career is over forever.
This scenario didn’t happen – except in my head. It’s the one which plays once in awhile before speaking events to trip me up and shake my confidence. It’s the image that keeps me stuck at times and from taking bold, new steps to go to the next level where God desires me to be. It’s the reason for my resistance.
Resistance is defined as opposing, retarding, denying, or rejecting. During psychoanalysis, there are many signs that the client and therapist are making progress and working toward identifying the root of the problem. One sign of PROGRESS is resistance, which is a disruptive response by the client to a sensitive topic. The reason it is sensitive is because it is the source or close to the source of the anxiety.
I.e., you’re getting a little too close to what hurts or scares you the most, and you are going to head it off at the pass. Things like charging for your products and events, or raising your prices. Hosting a webinar or a live event. Doing a JV telesummit with well-known experts. Doing videos and uploading them to YouTube. Joining Pinterest. Sending in an article to an editor.
As women entrepreneurs, we struggle with resistance, too. Our unhealed emotional pain/traumas of the past and our fears (both real and imagined) are what cause us to resist moving forward and to have the success we desire.
Think of what you may be resisting in your business. Usually there are fears/anxieties underlying our resistance, such as:
- Fear of failure
- Fear of success
- Fear of the unknown
- Fear of inadequacy
- Fear we’ll look silly or dumb
- Fear of embarrassment
- Fear of not being “good enough”
- Fear that so many people will sign up for our new program, that we’ll be overwhelmed and won’t be able to manage it
- Fear of rejection
- ____________________ (You name your fear.)
It’s important to give a nod to the resistance, to name it, to acknowledge it is there and not deny it. It’s also important to ask WHY it’s there, as long as you don’t wallow in the why, keep staring at it and doing nothing about it (other than allowing it to control your life!).
We can pretend the resistance isn’t there by doing inane things like obsessively organizing or cleaning our desk, closet, drawer; writing another long to-do list; shopping; eating too much; talking on the phone, texting; checking email; spending hours on Facebook; walking the dog; watching t.v.; taking another online class and always learning, never applying, etc. You know, doing anything except what will catapult you into real success.
It’s time to look at the resistance and conquer it, because it’s holding you back, dear friend. It’s your time, because you’ve been hiding way too long and God is wanting to use you to display His glory.
After you realize the resistance is there, then you can move past it by releasing it to God and asking for His help, and taking small steps of faith and action. You might need friends to pray with you and to encourage you to take that first step or even that giant leap. As you begin taking more steps of faith, the resistance will melt and you will gain more confidence in Christ and will move more fully into your Divine destiny.
Keep in mind one of the reasons for your resistance is that as a believer in Christ, you have an enemy, Satan, who is resisting you and your great purpose. He doesn’t want you to succeed and to be everything God has created you to be.
Give your resistance to God…and let Him help you overcome it by His Spirit today.
“So he answered and said to me: “This is the word of the Lord to Zerubbabel: ‘Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,’ says the Lord of hosts.” – Zechariah 4:6, NKJV
Beth Jones is a Christian speaker, author, life coach, wife and mom of 3 beautiful daughters. She resides in Kansas City, MO. Her mission is equipping women to hear God’s voice, unlock their gifts, and pursue their passion.
You can find out more about Beth’s products, events, and services at www.BethJones.net.
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